I Could, But I Won’t (Even When I Wish I Could)

There are moments when I wish I could be the kind of person who churns out faceless content purely to make ends meet. I could detach from my thoughts and feelings, vanish into anonymity, and effortlessly earn enough money to afford the reliable car I desperately need—or even just a pair of sturdy headphones with actual padding, instead of the frayed plastic ones that leave me aching.

A pair of worn, over-ear headphones with frayed padding, resting on a black and purple gaming chair.

Sometimes I long for relief from the constant grind of survival mode, knowing that living within it is exhausting. But I’ve come to understand that these challenges—draining as they are—are also the crucible in which resilience and personal growth are forged. This truth, I know all too well.

But I’m not wired to be apathetic. I care deeply about the work I share with the world. Each piece I create is not just a product, but a reflection of my values, intentions, and commitment to making a difference.

I hold onto the hope that what I craft offers someone comfort, a sense of being seen, or a fleeting escape from loneliness. I want to share the lessons I’ve learned and make light upon the paths for people like me to follow—light I wish I’d had when I was coming up in this industry.

If I were indifferent, I might already be swimming in wealth, my needs met in record time. Yet I find myself bound to my values. So I wait a little longer for that car, those new headphones, or whatever small dream I hold close.

And yes, some days that reality stings. There are times when resentment bubbles up, and I wish I could flick a switch to turn off my passion. But it’s not that simple, because the Dreamspace isn’t about shortcuts or quick victories. It’s a realm devoted to creating something authentic—something I can stand behind, even if the journey is slower, the costs are higher, or the timelines stretch longer than I’d prefer.

This Dreamspace is where my values, aspirations, and creativity converge, shaping the work I do and the person I am becoming.

I could choose the easier path. But I won’t. Because I still believe, with every fiber of my being, that what I create truly matters. And that belief, that unwavering commitment to my craft, is what keeps me going, even when the road is long and the rewards seem distant.


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One response to “I Could, But I Won’t (Even When I Wish I Could)”

  1. […] with pride,Not knowing the heart that aches inside.Roots seek solace in unshaken earth,But none see the struggles that measure its […]

Hello, I’m Nicole Myers

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